What not to do in choosing a prospective partner: through an analysis of Frank Russo's life!
Ben Scott - June 10, 2016.
The case that we discussed yesterday in regard to Matthew's exceptive clause, can be amplified somewhat for the benefit of youths that are reaching out to the opposite sex, for the purpose of acquiring a marriage partner.
One may be living with a brother or sister, and maybe under pressure to get married and get a place of his own. So he's not looking for a long engagement or long period of friendship. This is the first major mistake... one must never rush into a marriage! Secondly he maybe a Jehovah's Witness and is aware that he should "marry in the Lord"... this however might limit his field of choice dramatically, to a few uneducated and unlettered though honest and sincere "sisters". This is a serious problem, because if he were not to marry an intellectual equal, it would be like yoking a horse together with a donkey, and he may be embarrassed at introducing a real "dimwit" to some of his smart acquaintances... so much so that he may find himself speaking and verbalizing answers for his partner!
If there is a suitable alternative - i.e. someone compatible who's keen to convert to the faith - that should be a viable proposition! And one should not necessarily be swayed by the occasional sister who may work for a bank, and might appear much better than the rest... she may actually tell you that she works in the "lending department", but she of course doesn't tell you that she couldn't handle money nor carry out any calculations... of course she's not going to tell you that her father may have told her often, that she was going to end-up as a "washer woman", and it may have been him who got her the job with his connections.
For all you know, he maybe a Masonic, and may have 3 pages full of important people in the Public Service who owe him 'favours'! She might brag to you that she's been to business college, but doesn't tell you that all she can do is type and that she left school - with no prospects of going any further - at the end of year nine. You're sucked in because she tells you that her family is running the state, but may not tell you that they all failed Matriculation and got their massive jobs through connections!
You may feel attracted to her because she's shy and has blonde hair, but she may not tell you that she's had a lover with whom she may have committed 'loose conduct' right up to her baptism, at which time she may have met you, and for which she may actually re-baptize herself when you remind her of her former boyfriend at a much future time... and when you say that you hate bleached blonde hair and would never marry a girl with bleached blonde hair, she might lie and tell you that she is a natural blonde.
Of course she is not going to tell you that she's not really shy, but that she's actually mentally ill instead... and that it's due to one of her mental illnesses - namely depression and its associated suppressed appetite - that she is incredibly slim and malnourished!
By now you're of course smitten, and don't realize that she's learnt all these conversation cues so as to appear conversant robotically with anything you might say... e.g. "yeah really?!", "wow that's great! "is that really true?!", "fair dinkum!", "heck!" and many others.
You might actually find that her family would know how hopeless she is, and are glad to have a 'sucker' take her away... they may actually give her the worst wedding reception you've ever been to in your whole life, whilst pampering their other children who despite having no talent may actually be sent to very expensive schools ( or at least one would be sent there).
If you're not careful you will end-up with an alcoholic who drinks to forget how hopeless she is. And the worst facet of it all, maybe that she may not have any impulse control - it may actually be in her genes from her father - she may actually explode in domestic violence without provocation at any time... and is even likely to punch you whilst you're sleeping.
SO IF YOU'RE AN INEXPERIENCED AND NAIVE YOUNG MAN...TAKE GREAT CARE! BECAUSE IF YOU MAKE THESE STEPS AND ARE TOTALLY DECEIVED: your life will be ruined and you might never recover!
Ps - After his divorce and following his wife's becoming a full blown schizophrenic, she said the voices kept telling her: "the only reason you were brought into existence was to destroy (your husband) Frank!"